Saturday, May 06, 2017

6 lessons learnt in 6 months of marriage

Yes it has been 6 months since I got married. Time Flies would be the understatement of the year. 6 months of being Mrs Krupa. 6 months of living in a new house with a new family. So what have these 6 months been like? Well a roller coaster indeed, but a slightly tame one.

Here are 6 things that I have learnt in these 6 months of being married.

1) Wedding Albums are the the most tiring job.
When I said 6 months of being married, I am sure the thought crossed your mind that you haven't seen my wedding pictures yet. Well if you are friends with my dad on Facebook you would have seen some snippets, but the album is not yet printed and I have not yet updated any pictures on my Facebook yet. Why?? Well the first 2,3 months just seeing the pictures got me very emotional and I all I could do was stare the pictures and not really think logically about what to print and what to discard. The next 2-3 months just went by in a whirl of household duties, travel and general laziness. Honestly putting together the album was not as fun as posing for it was.

2) Don't opt to make Puri when you are heading out for the day.
Did that title make you go 'eh'?? Well the story goes like this. I really wanted to make puri sagoo one weekend as breakfast and it so happened that I ended up making this on a day when I had to head out in the morning. It took me well over 60 minutes to roll out about 40 odd puris and lets not forget another hour to get the sagoo done before that. What's the lesson learnt here? A major one in time management. Don't choose to go in for elaborate menus when you need to go out. You don't need to try and impress anyone.

3) There is still an 'I' in Marriage
I still refer to the wedding as MY wedding when I talk to my husband, and he looks at me and says -OUR wedding. So yes there is a lot of WE, US, OURS in a marriage, but that doesn't mean there is no I.
I still go to meet up with my friends, I still blog and take tuition. He still plays cricket. I still wear makeup and shoot outfit pics. He still heads out for badminton over the week. So every activity is not an us activity and it is totally okay. It is good in fact to have your own hobbies. Definitely keeps you sane.

4) Spontaneity is enjoyable when you plan in advance.
Before the wedding my husband warned me that he loves late night drives, random visits to the ice cream parlour, and spontaneous travel plans. I am like the least spontaneous person. My OCD for being planned is real and can be a bit of a problem at times. However post marriage there have been too many circumstances where I have had to drop all of my plans and just go with the flow. Of course I was annoyed initially, but then I figured that I only was I could really enjoy impulsive plans is by finishing up my work in advance. Like for example, this post is being drafted 3 days before it has to go live. Now even if I cannot look at the laptop for the next 3 days, I still have the post all ready to go and I am not going to be all cranky because I didn't get this up on the 9th.
But to be honest, I do kind of enjoy the random visits for pancakes at 10pm, so being spontaneous is not all bad.

5) Going home means 1 of 2 places.
They say home is where the heart is right? Well my heart is torn between Bangalore and Chennai. How do I know this?
When we went on a trip recently and I recall thinking to myself, I cannot wait to get home i.e. back to Chennai. I smiled at that thought because I realised that I had accepted it as home. It was my new sanctuary, my place to be me, my room, my bed, my wardrobe brimming with clothes (Okay I mean our room, our bed,and our wardrobe but you get the point right?). 

6 ) Marriage is only as hard as you make it.
A lot of people told me that you need to work on your marriage every day. The relationship needs to be nurtured and taken care of. You need to put in effort to keep things smooth. 6 months down the line I find myself wondering why marriage is hard. Yes of course it needs some adjustments every now and then, but isn't that the case even with your friends and siblings. No one ever comments that friendship requires work to be maintained. Nope, all they say is that if you are truly friends then you can just pick up from anywhere.
Well I think being married is just the same. It is only as hard as you decide to make it.

krupa